Pacifiers, Pumps, and the World

Last week, we spoke to a woman who used to get sheltered too much by her parents, to the extent that she was only allowed to watch TV at home, and nothing else. Riding a bike was a no-no because mom did not want her to scrape her legs. Dad was quite strict about studying, saying young kids should focus on it even on the weekends to have a better future. Hence, the woman could not remember a day when she was able to play outdoors like the other children in the neighborhood.

That is unacceptable, frankly speaking, since pediatric specialists keep on seeing that their patients who have started battling a mental disorder early happen to be the kids who never commune with nature. They stay indoors most of the time, playing video games or merely staring at the corners of the house. While their friends are hanging out at the park or a friend’s house, they end up not even getting some sun for days. If you must know, this lack of socialization and vitamin D deficiency often push people down the depression lane.

To supplement this argument, in a study conducted by Frances E. Kuo, PhD, on the possible treatment to ADHD by exposure to nature, she was able to conclude that, “Overall, our findings indicate that exposure to ordinary natural settings in the course of common after-school and weekend activities may be widely effective in reducing attention deficit symptoms in children.”

The fact mentioned above does not make over-sheltering kids seem so ideal now, does it? Your children may not get influenced or bullied by others, they won’t ever be at risk of being in an accident, but the prolonged stay indoors affects their mental health adversely.

Marilyn Price-Mitchell, PhD, further convinces us that “There are many scientific studies that underscore the benefits of nature, including stress relief, improved short-term memory, increased mental energy, less inflammation, better vision, improved concentration, creativity, and improved mental health. For families, the great outdoors is a natural playground that contributes to a child’s positive development.”

Let us give you a few more reasons not to let your kids stay cooped up at home.

1. It Stimulates The Senses

Being in nature more often typically makes a child’s senses sharper than ever. They get to play with soil, feel the grass under their feet, smell the flowers, see bugs and explore other things that can occur outdoors. These are the things that they can only understand in theory or through descriptions in books if you don’t allow them to go outside.

2. It Enhances Cognitive Skills

Danae Lund, PhD, LP, opines that “unstructured outdoor play helps kids learn to take turns, share and develop other positive behavioral skills. They are more likely to be inventive, explore and learn about the world around them and use their own abilities.” The environment consists mainly of living things that grow and wither. As said earlier, there may also be creatures or plant species that may switch on the curious side of the kids and cause them to observe what they do, what their colors are, and how big they become. That can improve their thinking skills better than tuning into National Geographic at home.

3. It Relieves Stress

In case you have not fathomed it before, children can acquire stress from the activities they need to accomplish every day. For instance, they got to wake up at six in the morning when there’s school, participate in class discussions until around three in the afternoon, and still have dinner and do their homework before resting at night. If such kids don’t go out once in a while, they won’t have an outlet for their stress.

4. It Builds Up Creativity

It is best to take the young ones to a natural park that does not have slides and swings, to be honest. With the man-made playthings on site, after all, it seems automatic for children to know how they should play. However, if they are in an open field with some huge trees, it will enable them to use their imagination and create different games on their own.

Final Thoughts

Depression and anxiety are two of the most common disorders that kids as young as three years old can develop. They tend to isolate themselves from youngsters their age and, worse, even attempt to self-harm at times. If you don’t want your child to be part of the statistics, though, it matters to encourage him or her to leave the house sometimes and play outdoors like the others to boost their mental health.

Good luck!

 

 

According to parent counseling experts, parenting is a much-underrated subject that most people avoid discussing. Since raising a child in this world and at this very moment is stressful, parents should learn the essential ways to incorporate discipline in their parenting. Hopefully, these tips will at least get them started in thinking about proper child parenting.

Most parents’ goal is to do parenting well. As much as possible, they want to avoid giving kids’ lessons, hope they get through life struggles and wish everything turns out okay. But these things don’t happen in an instant that’s why there’s a need for guidance and experience-based learning. The need to have a default response is essential at times since most parents don’t have an idea where to start.

Parenting Tips

• Consider following a parenting plan where you should be able to understand the importance of advance thinking. The people that need to be involved in your kids’ lives and how they can influence them are still part of your job.

 

 

• Set goals and boundaries as to what you want your kids to achieve in life whether in school, community or even at home. Help your children to continue to grow and encourage them to step out on their independence by following exact boundaries. Cultivate their knowledge and skills so they would know their function in the world they are living in. “[B]eing goal-oriented is a critical part of how children learn to become resourceful, which is defined as one’s ability to find and use available resources to solve problems and shape the future,” explained Marilyn Price-Mitchell, PhD. She added, “Children learn to be resourceful through the practice of being goal-directed.”

 

• Always remember that you are the parent. Children will reach the age where they think they can handle almost everything. It will create a complication once they assume they know more than you do as a parent. Instead of allowing kids to demand their rights, you as a parent will still need to be a tone-setter inside the home.

 

• Make kids understand that you’re the one that should lead and guide them in their life choices. And when certain expectations aren’t met, let them know that consequences and punishments are inevitable. Make sure that you make it very clear to the children that it is your responsibility to take care of them and they have to follow the rules.

 

• Listening to your children is necessarily essential. Since their developmental stage is prone to confusions and curiosity, always be there to guide them and make them understand. Help them to figure out what they can do, what they want, and whoever they want to be. Try to support their ideas and build a lasting relationship with them. Show the kids’ value, listen to them, and create a meaningful conversation. “[M]any children say they wish they could talk to their parents more, but their parents don’t listen. Or they overreact. Or they just wouldn’t understand,” wrote Laura Markham, PhD. “Most of all, parents are too busy. Moving too fast. But slow listening is a skill we can develop. We can start by slowing down.”

 

• Even if you can decide for your kids, you need to allow them to express themselves. Be open to the idea of how they understand different situations. Don’t lock them in a box where there’s only right or wrong. Allow them to respond to their surroundings with their understanding. This way, you can help them build confidence and self-worth. Encourage your kids to develop the emotional, physical, and mental capabilities. According to Beverly Amsel, PhD, “When a parent can acknowledge their child’s hate and anger and be curious about it, that child is being given the gift of a future where he can navigate the world with the ability to tolerate his own and others’ feelings.”

 

 

No one said that parenting was easy. It creates stress and a lot of work. But if you put in mind that what you do is beneficial for your child’s overall development, you’ll realize that your contribution matters.

 

Every time a baby whines, we immediately stand on our feet and find means to soothe them. Are parents too ready to give in to their baby’s wants? The thought of disciplining an infant is just so hard after all they are just tiny helpless humans?

Continue reading “Four Things That You Are Spoiling Your Baby”

Bullying is one of the significant issues faced by students nowadays. Bully is an unwanted and aggressive behavior done by an individual usually a child or teen through real or perceived power imbalance like popularity, physical strength and access to embarrassing information to control and harm classmates or kids. It includes anything simple like spreading malicious rumors to physical aggression and even sexual assault. “Bullying may inflict physical, psychological, social or educational harm on a victim. Behaviors include verbal and physical aggression that ranges in severity from making threats, spreading rumors and social exclusion, to physical attacks causing injury.”, Dorothy Espelage, PhD explained. In essence, bullying is an abusive use of power. Studies show that even at a young age, children also seek the feeling of being in control and powerful. Often, bullies were at one point powerless in their life and realized that power is the better end of the stick. Abusing power through bullying can be addictive just like a potent drug. Another possible reason is the bully is hurting, and he used intimidation as a maladaptive defense mechanism. “Bullying is a problem that occurs well beyond the school years and prevention will take a comprehensive societal approach.”, Marlene Seltzer, M.D. wrote. 

Provide a compassion and respectful relationship since the child is small.Parents are advised by experts to teach their children about bullying and how to handle such situations. Since whether we like it or not, children might experience bullying at one point in their life. The goal is not to bully-proof your child’s life but instead provide support to help him develop awareness and skill to protect himself and seek help. Research revealed the bullying could start in preschool and increases as kids grow. In general, surveys reveal that about 40 to 80 percent of school-age children participate in bullying behavior which shows the bullying is already ingrained in the school culture. Many children stated that they were subjected to bullying but also bullied others at one point. With these findings, experts recommended culture of school transformation, conflict resolution training, and restorative justice circles. Despite the efforts of school administration, it is still a struggle to curb the problem of bullying. The parents then equip their kids on how to stand up against bullying behavior.

The best way to prevent bullying and to be a bully is to provide a loving and respectful environment for the child. Do not use physical violence to punish and to solve conflicts since research has supported that it is associated with bullying behaviors.

Communicate with your child no matter what, and often kids are embarrassed to admit that they are being bullied. Always remember to have a good relationship with your child. Prioritize your relationship with your child more than anything.

Show confidence

Show your child that you don’t back down quickly just to avoid making a scene. Experiment ways on how to assert your rights respectfully. Remember your child is learning from you and his surroundings.

Teach your child respectful self-assertion.

Practice with your child’s words and phrases to say when somebody is bullying him or taking advantage of him. Examples are:

“It’s my turn to play now.”

“Please stop that.”

“Take your hands off me.”

“I don’t like being called that. I want you to address me by my name.”

“Help your children recognize their strengths. Acknowledge their weaknesses and point out that everyone has weaknesses and that it’s okay.”  said Annabella Hagen, LCSW, RPT-S

Just when you thought you’re done suffering from your child’s terrible twos stage, parents soon realize that preschool years are not exactly a walk in the park. As the preschooler expands his/her independence, he will develop a new set of behavioral problems. Take these changes as regular part of growing up and accept misbehavior as a learning process to realize the consequences of breaking the rules, and as time goes by, your preschooler will turn out wiser and more prepared for decision making. Experts gather and discussed the most common preschooler behavioral problems and how can parents address these issues.

Continue reading “Preschoolers’ Behavioral Problems and How To Handle Them”

People call them terrible twos for something. Have you found yourself in the negotiation table with none other than your 2-year-old over wearing the queen Elsa dress in class picture day? Have you experienced the judgmental stares from everybody in the supermarket when your child was throwing tantrums?  

Continue reading “Dealing With Self-Asserting Toddlers”

 

Becoming a mother to a newborn baby can be overwhelming and challenging all at the same time. The journey of a new mother can be tough in the beginning but all the sleepless nights and exhausting mommy duties will be worth it. There is nothing more exciting than taking good care of your child, whom you have carried in your womb for nine months.

Continue reading “6 Effective Tips For New Moms”