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As a mom, we often tell ourselves that we know our kids better than others. That is because aside from carrying them for nine long months, we got to take care of them until they learn to walk and talk. We believe that we know better because these children share our same genes and all. But regardless of the entire viewpoint we have, our kids will have this intractable attitude. No matter how calm and open we are about their needs; these little ones will still have a false sense of power over us. Since not all of the children are the same, let us try and understand the different types of children tenacity.
The Stubborn
It is a type of children’s attitude where listening is never an option. These kids get often focused on what they want, and they disregard parenting rules. Stubborn kids know the consequences of their actions. However, they care less of it since they know they can always get away with their misbehavior. They often make people around them, upset every time they are displeased and disappointed. It is as if they want the whole world to suffer every time they are in anguish. These kids are way too susceptible that sometimes even the slightest of things become a big deal for them. They often isolate themselves, and they never accept that they are wrong. They believe that punishment is inappropriate because they assume that everything they are doing is part of their development.
“There are times when we might decide that force is warranted. For instance, most parents have forced a resistant child into a car seat. So, I’m not saying that you won’t, at times, decide that you need to use force. The key is to keep those times to a minimum, because every time we use force, we’re creating pushback later. So if you’re doing this daily, it’s a signal that you need to rethink the situation,” wrote Laura Markham, PhD.
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The Headstrong
Children with a headstrong attitude believe in one thing – themselves. These little kids think they are always in charge of everything. They do not follow the rules because they feel they are the rules. They do not consider others feelings because these kids believe theirs are much more critical. They are often aggressive, and they take things by force too. These kids get easily angry and agitated, as well. In some unfortunate cases, headstrong children get regarded as disrespectful ones because of their dominant attitude towards adults and peers. These children want everybody to agree with them always and will show tantrums when people will not cooperate and go against them.
“Sometimes parents avoid giving strong-willed kids consequences because they don’t want to deal with the aftermath. But strong-willed kids need to develop an understanding of when their behavior crosses the line,” says Amy Morin, LCSW.
The Closed-Minded
Kids that are close-minded causes parent’s to a power struggle. They have this lack of concern towards the things around them. These kids do not show empathy to their friends and siblings and only listens to their parents when they think they have to. These types of children are often smart in creating excuses in spite of whatever circumstances. They listen to their opinions only and do not accept and believe in constructive criticism. They are often selfish and irrational. They think they are smart enough to win an argument with friends, siblings, and even their parents.
Laurie Hollman, PhD, advises parents to “trust your child’s opinions, ideas, thoughts, choices, and want very much to hear them before you throw in your ideas and suggestions. Listening first before you offer any of your own opinions or solutions often leads to your child coming up with his or her own good judgments.”
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Kids’ attitude is something that parents should watch out. If in case it is getting obvious, they should change their parenting way. Because in the end, those children’s misbehavior will become a reflection of failed parenting.